Monday, June 26, 2006

Hoping for so Much More

Once again, the TV weather people (I neglect to call them meteorologists, partly out of respect for real scientists, and partly because it is difficult to spell) have failed us. The drenching rains that have covered the Northeast for the last three days were supposed to subside, at least temporarily today, but they did not. Viewers of local news outlet known strangely as "Action News" were subjected to Cecily Tynan's lame explanation thusly:
"We were hoping that the air flow would contribute to drier conditions..."
Wait ... "hoping"? You were hoping? Millions of dollars worth of satellite feeds, screens with names that use the word "radar" like Homer Simpson uses the word "beer" ... gauges, dials, things that spin and colored maps that even Johannes Kepler couldn't understand - and you were hoping? For $600,000 a year, Cecily, I was expecting so much more.
But, she wasn't done. On her return trip to the news desk to schmooze with the anchors, they asked her what the weekend was looking like? (As if she would know). After knocking on the fake-wood studio desk, she "hoped" it would be nice and dry. "Does knocking (fake) wood count for more or less than hoping?", I wondered quietly to myself. No matter, they're laughing now, and they get paid at the end of the week.
Here's a proposal for our local ABC television station. I will do the weather for 10% of Cecily's salary, and I'll do all the hoping you want. Just to drum up support, I'll pledge to divide the remaining $540,000 evenly among the field reporters who are made to stand in the rain and snow all year long, for the purpose of telling us that it is raining and snowing. As though we couldn't look out a window and do our own report.
I hope that our local station will take me up on the offer.

10 comments:

Kate Michele said...

I'd take you up on it!!!

And I'd just like to say that, if Mr Bush said he was "hoping" to not of lost so many American lives in Iraq, There wouldn't be so much laughing going on!! I'm Just sayin'...I'm not sure "Hoping" was the proper word for her to of used.

On another note: I had no idea they made so much money...Do all local weather reporters make that much?? Cause thats CRAZY.

Anthony said...

Well, she's the one out of the local 3 that gets her name billed first - that's right - ahead of the anchor, so I guess she's the highest paid.
But the others probably aren't far behind.

And since the weather was the lead story tonight - yes, that's right - maybe she should be the highest paid, but 600 grand is ridiculous.

Kate Michele said...

Its also ridiculous that the weather is the lead story!!! COme on now... Whats to report on we all have windows.... You can;t tell me there was nothing else more important happening to report on!!

Anthony said...

Apparently not. They had a guy standing in the rain, and another woman standing where it WAS raining ... both telling us about the rain ... as the first story.

In Philadelphia, you'd figure there would be more important things, but I suppose not.

Pam said...

What the F am I doing TEACHING???? I can hope with the best of them. Especially for $600,000.

That's the problem with us damn liberals. We're willing to work at jobs that matter for little pay instead of selling ourselves out to the highest bidder.

Jes said...

It's the best job ever...you can say anything you want, and you're never held accountable if you're wrong. I can't believe in our liability crazed country no one has sued them yet.

Carmen said...

This rain is killing me. Leaks, flooding, detours, traffic. Ugh

Anthony said...

Carmen, the rain in D.C. was so bad, it took out the tree that is featured on the back of the $20 bill. The one on the far right on the image on the back.

http://www.nbc10.com/news/9427842/detail.html#

Not so unusual for a city built on a swamp, I guess.

Miss Myra said...

Walk in, stomp in, stomp in my swamp, I'll swallow you in my swamp.

hehe

Anyway, the TV "weather people" ARE over paid! And our country is in debt! I think we need to cut pay for actors and actresses too!

Start paying MOMs (or dads)...to stay home with their kids. Now that is money well spent!!!

kimmyk said...

It's storming now where our weather guy said partly cloudy with a CHANCE of rain. It's pouring buckets as I type this.


They dont know what they're talking about---you'll do a fabulous job! LOL!