My Sick Mind

I'm watching a TV commercial for Coors Light. It features something they call a "re-sealable cap." For those people who can't finish an entire Coors Light beer and have to put the cap back on to finish it tomorrow. Amazing. Just drink water. It costs less and you get the same buzz. Later, there was another ad (Bud Light?) featuring a guy who had replaced the gas tank of his vehicle with a beer tap and filled the trunk with ice and cold beer. This, in spite of continued messages discouraging driving while intoxicated. I suppose it's OK as long as you're trying to sell beer. The ads are always followed with that small print "remember to drink responsibly" caveat, as though we're thinking about that while we're pouring beer down in our faces. Shouldn't it be one or the other? Either we don't want people drinking and driving or we do. Make up your mind. I see a lot of junk food with notes on the label that says "0 grams Tran...

Here. Have respect for your opponent. Which is the cool part about blogging. We always have our legacy to fall back on. The Eagles made a valiant effort but fell short, as they often do. The story around here on Monday will be about how Donovan McNabb almost never runs the team to a two-minute victory. They were 7 points down with 2:45 to go and failed at four attempts. That's the story in the end. In fact, they lost the game in the first half. We tend not to focus on the first part of anything, tending to lean on the second part. In the second part, they had a chance, but the gap they left themselves with made the second half almost insurrmoutable. Now comes the off-season where fans will debate the future of the quarterback and coach. That's half the fun. The other half is going to a Super Bowl.

The playoffs. And not just any playoffs - the NFL playoffs . The local team, the Eagles , is still involved ( are still involved). They're playing the Arizona Cardinals, who most people don't give a snowball's chance in Hell of winning on Sunday. Most people around here don't anyway. I'm not one of them. The Cardinals scare me a little, mostly because most people around here don't give them a snowball's chance of winning on Sunday. That doesn't mean I'm not rooting for the Eagles, it just means that I have a healthy respect for the opponent. The Eagles have been here before. "Here" being the NFC Championship game. For my non-sports fans, it's the game where the winner goes to the Super Bowl - the game with the office block pool. This is their fifth trip under large head coach Andy Reid. Three times they have lost, and on at least two of those occasions, the people around here didn't give a snowball's chance in Hell...

I'm always looking for the angle. I'm always looking for the swindle or the scam. Deep down, I don't think there are too many people who do things out of the goodness of their hearts - especially when it comes to sports or entertainment. I'm cynical that way. Last night , the Patriots' record-setting game against the Giants was televised on three networks. CBS, NBC and The NFL Network, which is a network by name only. Since The NFL Network is only available to 40% of households, it meant that the biggest event of the season so far would not be viewed by a majority of football fans, so the NFL signed up two real networks to help. NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell went on TV last night and told America that the game was on network television "for the fans." He stressed it and said it a few times. He kept repeating it, as though the more he said it, the more he would believe it and - hopefully - the more we would believe it. Mr. Goodell : Did you invent The N...

Remember the flesh-eating virus from a few years ago? That was like a head cold, comparatively. WASHINGTON - A dangerous microbe that has been spreading around the country causes more life-threatening infections than public-health authorities had thought and is killing more Americans each year than the AIDS virus, federal officials reported yesterday. The " superbug ," a strain of a once-innocuous staph ( Staphylococcus aureus or MRSA) bacterium that has become invulnerable to first-line antibiotics, is responsible for more than 94,000 serious infections and nearly 19,000 deaths each year, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention calculated. "This is a significant public-health problem," said Scott K. Fridkin, a CDC epidemiologist and one of the authors. " We should be very worried." OK , I’m worried. Thanks for that. This new strain of virus is impervious to antibiotics. There is hope, however. Among the prevention methods advocated by the CDC: G...

"Wow! I never thought Dwight would go postal. It's always the person you least expect and I always thought Dwight would go postal." - Michael Scott , The Office (deleted scene from "Conflict Resolution") Sure, it's always the person you'd least expect, unless it's the most obvious one. In pro sports, the most obvious people are the ones who are the lowest-paid. Referees and umpires. Athletes make too much money to be worthwhile targets for gamblers who want to fix games. They can't pay them enough. Worse yet are referees with gambling problems, and Tim Donaghy is one of those. The last thing we heard about Tim was that he was getting death threats and was threatening to go to the FBI with names of other refs and/or players who may also be involved in the point-shaving effort. Expect Tim to be the next member of the Witness Protection Program. Meanwhile, the Commissioner of the National Football League, Roger Goodell, has ordered Michael Vick no...

I have been busy on Ebay. Selling, not buying. I am gradually divesting myself of all the accumulated crap I have around here that has no function in my life. Eventually, I will be left with several appliances, my computer and my cat. Speaking of which, I received word that my aunt's family had to have their 15-year old cat put down this weekend. My guy is 16, and I have long ago begun the process of cherishing every day with him. I hope he is doing the same. Saturday night I decided to take in a Phillies game. When I go alone, I can usually get a pretty good seat, since there are generally oddballs left in the middle of rows that they can't sell. I got one in the first row at field level down the first base line. It sounded like a great spot, but it's a little too close. Kind of like being at one of those go-go joints where the dancers have B.O. You're happy to see her, but she could back it up a little. The annual nonsense known as the NFL draft went on this weekend. ...

Sunday is the Super Bowl . America's greatest secular holiday. Since I don't care about the game or who wins, I'll be taking it in at the local sports pub. I'm thinking epic blow-out ... like that 49ers-Bengals game or the Cowboys-Bills. So, here's the guess (with a pologies to Bears fans ): Colts 37 Bears 14 Strangely, I'm rooting for the Bears, but my gut feeling is that it will be all downhill for Peyton Manning, and the Bears defense isn't all it's cracked up to be. If th e Bears win, good for them. They'll prove me and some skeptics wrong about the inadequacies of the NFC, but I'm thinking that it ain't gonna happen. By the way, my numbers in the office blo ck pool are Colts- 0 , Bears- 7 , so root for the quarter scores so I can afford those Blue Man G roup tickets. ------------------------------------------------------ I can't believe that there isn't something better to run cars on than gasoline. Pam put up a YouTube...

NBC , in cahoots with the NFL , has instituted a flexible schedule for Sunday night, where they can arbitrarily move a game that was originally scheduled for the afternoon and have it played at night on national TV. Nevermind that it may inconvenience fans who travel to see the game or have to get up for work, the almighty Television is a master who must be served. A few weeks ago, they re-scheduled tonight's Eagles-Colts game. Along the way, the Colts lost (ruining their undefeated season), the Eagles played like crap in losing to Tennessee and Jacksonville and quarterback Donovan McNabb suffered a season-ending injury last week. The once marquee match-up turned into a game that had to be sold rather than sell itself. Television, in their attempt to manufacture history, has found that history cannot be manipulated, no matter how much money they throw at it. Few things make me happier than seeing corporate America screwed over. Televisions across America are being tuned out a...

The National Football League is moving closer to world domination every day. Forget about the crisis in the Middle East and the threat of terrorism, the real threat to our way of life is coming from the NFL. The top-rated TV show last week was Sunday night's Manning vs. Manning match-up on NBC, with 15,730,000 viewers nationwide. Seven of the top 20 programs last week were NFL games or pre-games. There is an entire network devoted to the games, called appropriately, the NFL Network . Hey, nobody said they were creative geniuses, just bent on world domination. There are games on Saturday, Sunday, Monday and Thursday. This Thanksgiving there are 3 games on, instead of the usual 2, because you can't have a holiday without 24-hour football. Tuesday at 10am, the Philadelphia Eagles drove another nail into my cynical coffin. They placed on sale an additional 1,500 seats for each home game. Eagles games are sold-out, and season tickets are harder to come by than Elton John's girl...