Don't write down anything you wouldn't say in public.

You have a way of making everything you say seem unreal.

Are you aware that the people who care are mostly stainless steel?

- Michael Nesmith "Writing Wrongs"

I don't get it. Of course, closing in on 52 years old makes me somewhat of a non-factor in the grand scheme of money and marketing, but still...

I just finished reading an article saying that Miley Cyrus was done with Twitter. I know - find a hobby, right? She said that the social networking site was robbing her of her privacy. Duh. What did she think it was for? My guess is that she initially saw it as a marketing tool but later found it to be a tool in general.

"Everything that I type and everything that I do, all the lame gossip sites take it and they make it news," she continued. "I want my private life private... I'm living for me."

Good idea. I'm caught up in this odd juxtaposition of what people want to know and what I want to tell them. Some people have no such conflict and post their personal life on the Internet - forgetting the power of something we call Google.

Trust me - as much as I put on this little space, there are scads more that I don't put here, because I understand the power of the Internet and what I believe to be personal and what I believe to be social.

In a personal interactive environment I will open the book, but not here. If you want to know, just ask - but I'm not writing it down.

I think there's a general misunderstanding about the technology that becomes apparent when the technology bites back. When some YouTube video implicates someone or a photo appears on a web site we're all over it and find blame with the technology, when the real blame is with the people who forgot how powerful the technology is.

I'm sure the first automobile drivers had a period of adjustment, as did the first marijuana users. Hey, this is powerful stuff and we'd better figure it out or else we'll be running people over and acting stupid in public. As much as we have adapted to this Internet deal, the idea is still less than a generation old and the people who are getting screwed by it (figuratively) are still working out the kinks.

Be careful out there.

Crazy-ass Duggars.

Even though I have no idea who these people are, they apparently have some sort of TV show.

I'm guessing that by now, if you do not have a TV show you are in the minority. Anyway, there's some cockamamie show called "18 Kids and Counting" which in itself is a title that encourages more offspring. It's on The Learning Channel. Somebody needs to tell me what they're "learning" over there, besides clamping your uterus shut. OK, so here's the big news:

The brood is about to grow again in 2010, as Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar are expecting their 19th child in the spring.

I think, after 7 children, you could be said to suffer from some form of mental illness. After 18, you could be classified as legally insane and a danger to those around you. Seriously, there are too many people in this country to begin with, and something like this should be illegal. Unfortunately, our ridiculous notion of freedom includes the freedom to have intercourse at will with little regard for the future of the planet. That might be an overstatement, but consider that there are enough children here for 9 families or two baseball teams. Meanwhile, I can't find a decent parking space.

And I'm certain you can't find a person in their social circle who would volunteer to tell the Duggars what they really thought. Maybe the first five or six times they announced another baby they were congratulated, but the other 13 or 14 times people probably had to bite thier tongues.

As previously reported on AccessHollywood.com, TLC will change the name of the Duggars' reality show to "19 Kids and Counting."

Oh, that's nice. I guess it leaves the door open (so to speak) for her to pop out kid number 20.

Keep counting.

When the sex hits the fans.

So, the David Letterman intern sex scandal (should those have all been capitalized?) is the big news story. Big news: High-powered, highly paid TV star has sex with young women. Whew! We really blew the lid off libido, didn't we? Wake the kids and phone the neighbors. Maybe I'm jaded, but I can't get worked up over the idea that people enjoy sex. What I can get worked up over is that I can't seem to find anyone who enjoys it as much as high powered, highly paid TV stars. The world seems to revolve around me.

Meanwhile, Dave seems to be using the thing for the sake of his little late night talk show deal. Rather than let it lie, he keeps bringing it up to the point of apologizing to his wife on the TV. Wouldn't an in-person apology suffice - or be preferable? Methinks it would if he weren't using it for the proliferation of his TV show. Now I'm not sure who is being used here - him, us or his interns. Better yet, who cares?
People (and celebrities in general) are always sorry after they get caught. They continue in their abhorrent behavior for years, and when they are apprehended they start apologizing. Career-ending death bed confessions, as it were. Apparently, it was acceptable until somebody found out about it. Those aren't apologies, they are pleas.

And then there's the continuing saga of Brett Favre.

Isn't it interesting how the TV sports commentators have to say "Brett Favre" in two words together when they're talking about him, rather than just saying "Brett" or "Favre?" Brett Favre is one of those two syllable expressions that has to be said together. I don't think any of us dislikes Brett as much as we dislike the media for creaming their pants every time he does something interesting. He's like a newborn baby, where every time he farts somebody thinks it's Beethoven. Get over it.

Television and media in general feeds off its own vomit, and in both cases, the rage and self-inflicted excitement make them great fodder for ratings. Favre's game against the Packers on Sunday's installment of Monday Night Football now stands as the most-watched telecast in cable TV history, drawing 21.8 million total viewers, per Nielsen live-plus-same-day ratings estimates. I'd guess that Letterman's little CBS program is getting its own ratings boost based on his past indiscretions - for which he is sorry.

It's all about television and getting us to watch, and when it comes to that, there is nothing that is off limits, including embarrassing oneself or shameless self-promotion.

In fact, it's pretty much what television is all about these days.

Homecoming

Kitty came home tonight.
 

Albeit in a small velveteen burgundy container, but home nonetheless. It's where he belongs.
 

I'm not sure where he'll rest, but for now he's on an end table next to the TV where I can keep an eye on him.
 

Yes, I can open the box but no, I'm not gonna.
 

I've decided that when I die (soon, I hope) I'm going to have our ashes mixed together and strewn about somewhere.
 

It's a little morbid, I guess, but then life is a little morbid, so he seems to fit right in.
 

Welcome home buddy.