My Sick Mind

Or rather, I've got ... um ... I have mail. This e-mail missive came allegedly from our Internal Revenue Service today: Dear Taxpayer, After the last annual calculations of your fiscal activity we have determined that you are eligible to receive a tax refund of $493.50. Please submit the tax refund request and allow us 6-9 days in order to process it. A refund can be delayed for a variety of reasons. For example submitting invalid records or applying after the deadline. To access your tax refund, use the form attached to this email. Regards, Internal Revenue Service Dear Taxpayer? What's my name? There was a "form" attached that I was supposed to access. I was supposed to download something, to which my response is: Download this . I knew it was phony for a number of reasons, not the least of which was the "regards" at the end and the bad punctuation. The IRS isn't concerned with my regard and they have no interest in regarding me as anything other ...

SAN FRANCISCO (AFP) – A California county is stopping restaurants from using toys to lure children to high-calorie, salt-laden food such as popular "Happy Meals" hawked by fast-food giant McDonald's. Elected officials in the county of Santa Clara, in the heart of technology center Silicon Valley south of San Francisco, voted Tuesday to enact the ban to fight an "obesity epidemic" sweeping California and the United States. "This ordinance prevents restaurants from preying on children's love of toys to peddle high-calorie, high-fat, high-sodium kids meals," said Ken Yeager, the county supervisor behind the ban. "This ordinance breaks the link between unhealthy food and prizes." Actually Ken, the unhealthy food is the prize. Parents run their kids to fast food restaurants because (a) it's cheap and (b) the kids like the food. Ken is another one of those politicians who thinks you can legislate the way people think and feel. It's ...

Am I the only person who finds it curious that baseball is the only game where the coach/manager wears a uniform? Football: Hoodie. Hockey & Basketball: Suit. Soccer: ... I don't know, I don't watch soccer, but I bet they aren't wearing shorts and those goofy shirts. I'd like to see a baseball manager in a suit like Connie Mack used to wear, but I'm sure the Gods of Baseball would stop that in its tracks. Baseball is also the only game that is stopped in the middle and not completed if they can't finish it. They should play in the rain like other sports. Even golfers play in the rain to a certain extent. Suck it up, Nancy-boys. I paid $45 for a ticket, $12 to park and $7.25 for a piss-warm draft beer - you can damned well play in the rain. And speaking of baseball ... and I was ... this little ditty over on the YouTube should be taking the Internet by storm soon, so you can say you saw it here first. Just make sure you leave your teeth in while you'r...

Nobody doubts that you're human. Our big question is whether you are an American. The human part is obvious. Beyond that, it's a guessing game unless you can show us some paperwork. PHOENIX – Arodi Berrelleza isn't one of the targets of Arizona's new anti-illegal immigration law — he's a U.S. citizen. But the 18-year-old high school student from Phoenix said he's afraid he'll be arrested anyway if police see him driving around with friends and relatives, some of them illegal immigrants. "If a cop sees them and they look Mexican, he's going to stop me," Berrelleza said. "What if people are U.S. citizens? They're going to be asking them if they have papers because of the color of their skin." Oh, you mean the same way young people get carded in bars because they look like they're under-aged? That's profiling too, but you don't see a group of protesters carrying signs to stop 17-year old's from being carded because...