My Sick Mind

LAWRENCE , Kansas - It used to be you could hardly give away Kansas University football tickets. But they aren’t free anymore - even for babies. That’s a fact the young Foust family of Lawrence learned the hard way. Owen and Lisa Foust bundled up their 3-month-old baby, Kate, on Saturday and headed to the Jayhawks’ season opener. When they presented two tickets at the gate, they were told Kate, who was strapped to her father’s chest, needed a ticket, too. To get into the game, they had to get out of line and buy another $35 ticket. Believe it or not, this made the news in Philadelphia, so don't think I'm picking on Kansas. “Everybody needs a ticket regardless of age,” KU associate athletic director Jim Marchiony said. He said the U.S. Department of Homeland Security has recommended that organizations require tickets for large events as a way to keep track of numbers. I think the number that KU is most interested in is the one with the dollar sign in front of it. Woo-hoo...

My latest cool search that I got from the Stat Counter inspired a little Haiku. Hope you can dig it. You tube panty poop. Searching your little heart out. You do not get shit. ------------------------------------------------------------- DETROIT - Alan Mulally, Ford Motor Co.'s new chief executive will get an annual base salary of $2 million and an immediate payout of $18.5 million for taking the job, the company said Friday in a filing with the Securities and Exchange Commission. Why does no one complain (at least no one I know) about this exhorbitant salary, when almost everyone complains about professional athletes earning the same thing? Maybe because Alan can't hit 50 home runs? All Ford needs is for him to hit one. Here's a clue, Alan : Alternative fuel. Get a grip. Stop listening to the White House and think for yourself. Give the people what they want - affordable transportation. It ain't the biggest problem in the world - we're only led to believe that it ...

I took a quick look at the "Weekend" section of the Philadelphia Inquirer today to see what famous artists were coming to town, and had to look at the upper-right corner of the paper to verify that today was September 8, 2006 . Stock up on Tylenol and No-Doz, rock fans. The Geezers are coming! On September 21, it's Blue Oyster Cult, Vanilla Fudge and Cactus coming to Glenside, PA. I saw Blue Oyster Cult 3 times in the 70s because they were headlining for someone I really wanted to see - and it wasn't Vanilla Fudge or Cactus. Next, Ian Anderson "Plays Orchestral Jethro Tull" on the 3rd of October. I guess the aging Tull fans are willing to sit still for the orchestra, and Ian doesn't have to jump around as much as he used to. Warm up the walkers! Over at the Tweeter Center, it's Aerosmith and Motley Crue on the 23rd. I guess they've run out of "reality" shows, so now it's off on the road. Judy Collins is at the TLA on the 15th...

Am I nuts, or is that kid wearing a toupee? I continue to be fascinated by the Google searches that turn up my blog. I'm funny that way. Today's favorite search that turned up my blog comes from London, England; and features the phrase "penile inversion vaginoplasty fuck" . I'm not sure if it bothers me that such a search turns up my blog, or that someone actually typed that in as a Google search. It turned up the John Mark Karr post [Kids and Creeps; Aug 20th], so I guess I can understand that part of it, although I'm clueless as to the curiosity that inspired it. I suppose someone could be curious about penile inversion vaginoplasty , and just add the fuck for color, although I would have added Cecily Tynan, and omitted the fuck. Meanwhile, the discussion over the death of Steve Irwin continues. Mostly, there is great shock over the circumstances. The Sting Ray is not supposed to be an attack animal, but I can't help but wonder why people would be surp...

President Bush greets arrives for a Labor Day observance at a maritime training institute in Piney Point, Maryland, September 4, 2006. "Now, remember kids; there's a terrorist out there, and he wants to get you. And, as soon as we find him, I'll let you out ... and don't worry ... soon, you'll be old enough to go overseas and fight those evil folks, 'cause this thing will go on for years." Seriously, can anyone tell me why the kids have to be held behind a barrier? Or, maybe they wanted to be behind the barrier. WASHINGTON - Quoting repeatedly from Osama bin Laden, President Bush said Tuesday that pulling U.S. troops out of Iraq would fulfill the terrorist leader's wishes and propel him into a more powerful global threat in the mold of Adolf Hitler. That's pretty good. He managed to invoke two horrible names into one speech (or three, if you include his) . It proves that he's improving as a communicator - economy of words and all. Now, if ...

I failed to understand the drawing power of our own Cecily Tynan. She does the weather reports for our local ABC affiliate, and people seem fascinated with her. I don't have an official count, but I'd estimate that she is responsible for about 20% of the views on this silly blog. I also didn't understand the lengths to which people will search for info on their favorite celebrities. For the record (as if there is one) I like Cecily - what's not to like? - and only mention her in my rants about the weather and the people who tell us about it because she is the most identifiable person on the top-rated newscast in Philadelphia. However, I can't help but wonder what the fascination is with her and her various articles of clothing. Yesterday, a search popped up under "cecily tynan's panties", from someone in Hummelstown, PA (home of the figurine, no doubt). What it uncovered was the phrase: Two weeks from now, they'll be draped in lingerie and ...

T oday is Labor Day, the most ironic holiday of them all. Since I am fortunate enough not to work in the service or retail industries, I have the day off. It's not a National holiday, since we don't have National holidays (not even Independence Day) it is a legal holiday . Legal holidays give employers the option to give employees the day off, or keep the business open. It is my opinion that there are way too many businesses open on legal holidays in this country. Generally, the holiday is an excuse for a [Name the holiday] Sale, with incredible bargains that can only be had on the other 15 holidays and selected weekends that the store is open. God forbid, we can't get 15% off the price of a pair of shoes unless we shop on Labor Day. The irony lies in the fact that generally, labor doesn't have Labor Day off. As usual, the crap gets thrown to the workers at the lower end of the wage scale, while the rest get the juice. Today, my local bank will be open, as well...

I could never watch this guy on TV because he irritated me so. Generally, he made a living bothering animals and proclaiming, "He don't like that a bit" in his Australian accent. BRISBANE, Australia - Steve Irwin, the hugely popular Australian television personality and environmentalist known as the "Crocodile Hunter," was killed Monday by a stingray during a diving expedition. He was 44. Irwin was filming an underwater documentary on the Great Barrier Reef in northeastern Queensland state when he was stung, Sydney's The Daily Telegraph newspaper reported on its Web site. The thing about animals is that they don't know that they're on TV. They cannot speak to complain or warn us to let us know that we are bothering them, and if we persist, they will have to take action. No matter how much of an "expert" one is doesn't matter to the guy doing the filming. My attitude is, leave the animals alone. They don't need us wandering ...