My Sick Mind

Now, finally we can put a number to it. 701,000. Female solo artists account for eight of the top 10 albums on The Billboard 200. Susan Boyle leads the pack as "I Dreamed A Dream" debuts at #1 with sales of 701,000. 701,000 official nitwits in the world. Now that we know that, we can get on with our lives. This is why we'll never do away with these so-called "talent" shows where celebrities are foist upon us. It's a pandemic worse than Swine Flu. It's worse because the only cure is death. I dreamed a dream ... that people actually had to have worked for their art instead of just showing up on a television show and being force-fed to the public. I can dream. MONTPELIER, Vt. – Richard Phillips, the ship captain toasted as a hero after he was taken captive by Somali pirates, ignored repeated warnings last spring to keep his freighter at least 600 miles off the African coast because of the heightened risk of attack, some members of his crew now all...

There's an online poll going on at CBS3 (one of the local news TV stations) asking if the recent Tiger Woods scandal has made you change your opinion of him. I answered "no." The reason I said no is because I never liked him to begin with. It's difficult for a scandal to alter ones opinion when the offender is seen as kind of a punk. Since my only impression of him is what I see on the golf course, what I see is a petulant child who seems to be spoiled by success and whines and moans whenever things don't go his way, throws clubs when he misses shots and berates journalists and fans if they dare to make noise while he's playing. He's a gentleman as long as he's winning, but he's what we humans call a "sore loser," and those types of people like things to go their way all the time. Now, he's apologetic - as we humans tend to be - because he got caught doing something he's been doing for a long time. Presumably, had he not been ...

I'm a bad American. President Obama is speaking on TV tonight, and I'm sitting here wondering which of my DVR programs I'm going to watch to fill the hour. I figure whatever he says I'll read in the newspaper tomorrow. So, maybe I'm not such a bad American after all, it's just a matter of time management. I'm not big on foreign affairs and the Middle East. I've never been. I'd make a lousy Jew, because I pretty much ignore the region. I figure, they've been fighting for five thousand years and they'll be fighting for five thousand more. I don't know of another culture that is as combative. Everything they do over there - Saudi Arabia, Egypt, Israel, Iraq, Iran et al - is designed to bring their hatred of somebody to the front. It isn't the way I conduct my life and I don't understand why a culture would want to propagate that sort of thing. Since I was a kid (when dinosaurs roamed the earth) I've been hearing about tension...

The Tiger Woods story is a microcosm of how we view and treat celebrities and how they treat us. I'll spare you the sordid details, since you've probably already read or heard enough to write your own blog. Suffice it to say the whole story smells and one wonders about the golf club damage to his vehicle and the cuts on his face to the point that we ... um ... wonder. What I'm getting out of the story (after days of agonizing analysis) is a lesson in celebrity treatment and what the public wants from them, which is usually more than they're willing to give. Celebrities want the limelight, the money and fame but when it comes to sharing the intimate details of their social life, they draw a thick line. Unless you're Madonna-esq, in which case you write a book detailing your sexual escapades. But if you drive an Escalade and play golf for a living, you tend to be a lot more close mouthed about your dalliances and the goings-on of your family life. But the celebrit...

It was a strange weekend. I lost 2 pounds. That in itself speaks for what a strange person I am. Where most people eat like ponies and spend three days regretting their gluttony, I ate the usual amount and took a container of leftovers home. I'm funny that way. I was also able to go three days without speaking to anyone. That in itself speaks for what a strange person I am. It's partly because nobody speaks to me and partly because I have nobody to speak to. If the cat could talk I'd be a happier person, but he makes an odd whining noise that I haven't yet been able to interpret. I'll go to work tomorrow and people will ask about my Thanksgiving. When I say that mom roasted a chicken, they will reply, "A chicken?" As though I committed a crime against nature by eating something besides turkey on Thanksgiving. Even though, every big family Thanksgiving dinner I ever attended (many years ago) consisted of people complaining about (a) the time ...