My Sick Mind

University of Southern California running back Stefon Johnson suffered an accident while weight lifting. The bar fell out of his right hand and landed on his throat, severely injuring him. At 5 feet 11 and 210 pounds, Johnson was able to survive the accident because the muscles around his neck helped him keep open a breathing passage, Hinika said at a news conference Tuesday."Had that been any one of us, meaning me, I would not have survived," Dr. Gudata Hinika, trauma director at California Hospital Medical Center said. "His neck was so solid and so muscular, that actually helped maintain his airway." In other words, if someone who didn't lift weights dropped a barbell on their neck, he would have died. That makes good nonsense. How about, "Hey, if he wasn't a weight lifter he wouldn't have dropped a barbell on his neck." That works too.

When I watch television, I want to see a game, laugh or learn something. Otherwise, I'm not interested. There are only a couple of dramas that I bother watching - FlashForward and Dexter . I don't have the time or energy to devote to watching regular people become celebrities, I don't care who survives, who races across the world fastest, which model is top and I find no enjoyment in watching short-order cooks scream at people. That's just me. I think we have plenty of celebrities and I see no need to create more by putting regular people on TV. I don't consider "reality" shows entertaining. Besides, when have you ever seen anyone act normal when a video camera is five feet away from them? If they want to show us doing what we really do, there should be a show called America Uses the Toilet or America Masturbates or America Picks its Nose . America Watches Television could be a reality show, but ironically I don't think anyone would watch. When i...

There is a story on Yahoo's front page touting an "imperfect" Mariah Carey, who is starring in a film called "Precious" and presumably was told to show up without a shred of makeup. ...when the director's first choice to play a dowdy, no-nonsense social worker - Oscar-winner Helen Mirren backed out, he quickly asked Carey to step in. Consider this quote from the diva: "That was such a freeing experience for me," Carey said during a recent interview. "By making me look so bad he brought out the ability to never be self-conscious again, and that was a gift that he gave me." Look so bad? They ran a photo (right) of the unkempt Carey, and my first thought was that she looks like 75 percent of the women in the world, and if this is her without makeup, I don't understand what is "imperfect" about her. It's a shame that our ideals about what constitutes attractiveness have gotten so far out of whack that a beautiful woman...

I watched a spider crawl across the rest room floor at work today. Exciting? You bet. When it comes to work stuff, it's a ten. Mostly though, it made me think. There isn't much left once you have resigned yourself to watching a spider crawl across a room other than thinking. So I thought. I thought about what the spider was doing. His life (as long as it may be) might be spent crawling from one end of our rest room to the other. He might be dead by the time he gets to the exit. If he isn't, the remainder of his time on earth wouldn't be worth much. Either way, it's a giant waste of his time. The thing I thought about was how the spider seemed to relegate himself to crawling. That was his lot in life. While other spiders were outdoors making webs or killing flies, this spider was spending his waning days crawling across our rest room floor. I saw no future in it, but the spider didn't know what I knew, so he kept crawling. We don't know if we're cra...

The bag people. They're relentless. They love bags and they can't wait to start giving them to us. It has become necessary now to be almost rude to them when they attempt to put a single item into a bag. There are just way too many bags being used. It's a bad habit we've gotten into as a society. Stop and check the number of times people leave a store with one or two items in a bag. What's the bag for? At the very least, you'd think the store would want to save a few cents and encourage their clerks to stop using so many bags. I walked into the store, picked out the thing I needed and carried it in my own hands to the counter and paid for it. Why then, is it necessary to have it placed in a bag so I can carry it out of the store? I think part of it is psychological - or maybe all of it is. Leaving a store without a bag constitutes stealing, and we don't like people to think we stole something. "Hey, look at that guy. He's carrying that sandwich o...