Saturday, April 9, 2011
Thursday, April 7, 2011
I watch that "Intervention" TV show once in a while. It's always the same three things:
- Crack or heroin addiction
- A guy who drinks too much
- Some eating disorder – generally not eating enough
That's the Intervention Trifecta. Of course, there are the rare occurances of combinations of the three – in pairs or all three. For instance, a crack-addicted alcoholic anorexic. That's a series.
It is kind of boring seeing the same problems over and over. They end the same way: They follow the guy around for a while, watching him stumble, shoot-up or throw up for a few weeks (that's called enabling) and then assemble the family so that they can get that bald-headed psychiatrist to tell him how screwed up his life is and send him off to a 3-week rehab in Florida. Some of us would view that as a paid vacation.
Then, one of his family members (usually a displaced uncle or some grandparent who he pissed on a few times) gets up and reads a heart-felt letter of regret and how ashamed they are of his screwed-up life. So much so, that they have decided to put him on display.
What the show should be doing is helping someone who can help others by changing his life. Alcoholics who sit at home and swill gin aren't hurting anyone but themselves. Crack addicts die in an alley. The show needs to do more good for society in general and stop focusing on the addict.
They could do a show about a guy with really smelly feet. Or a Dallas Cowboys fan who lives in Philadelphia. Gather the family around and scold somebody because they don't know what a Yield sign means. Or a guy who refuses to shovel his sidewalk when it snows or leaves piles of snow on top of his car and drives around. Get them straightened out.
Imagine a tear-stained aunt holding up a pair of brown loafers exclaiming, "See what you're doing to us!" Their family dinners have been ruined by his foul and unpleasant odor. "You're tearing us apart!" They could even bring in a few shoe salesmen that have had to lean over his feet.
Help us, television.
As Democrats in the Senate argue that "ideology" is the only thing standing in the way of a deal to avert a government shutdown, House Republicans are countering that's simply not true.
Hmm … point well made. They can't even agree on what is causing the disagreement.
I say, let them shut it down. Maybe we'll see how well we do without them. Or … are they afraid we'll realize they aren't necessary? If it is shut down long enough, private industry will take over many services, and probably for less cost. And then, the displaced government workers can try working a real job for a change.
Talk about culture shock.
Sunday, April 3, 2011
The Yield Sign.
The yield sign is the most misunderstood appliance on the highway. My driving school would spend a day or two on it, and students would not graduate (or be allowed to drive at all) until they possessed a total understanding of the sign and what it means to drivers who approach it on the road.
Let's say that the yield sign is applied to your everyday life. You're standing in line at the supermarket (my favorite place) and while you're standing there, another shopper walks into your line and just places himself in front of you. That's not right. If life had a yield sign, it would keep people from moving into your line while you're waiting or taking your movie theater seat while you're walking down the aisle in front of them. It means "yield the right of way."