It's mulch season. Before the discovery of mulch, somehow trees and plants grew in soil without the aid of shredded trees bathed in fertilizer. I don't know how, but legend has it. Meanwhile, my development stinks like a compost heap.
The landscapers were out all day today, spreading the junk everywhere. For some reason, they chose to pile it in the middle of our entrance-way. I would have complained, but most of them don't speak English. Besides, I think they like the smell.
Once I managed to make my way through a 10-foot pile of shredded fertilized trees, I took my auto to have its oil changed. I've been using synthetic motor oil because I'm told it's better for the engine, and I'd like to own the car beyond the time I'll be paying for it. So I asked the guy at the oil change place, "You recommend changing the oil every 3,000 miles, but isn't the synthetic stuff good for longer than that?"
He replied, "It is, but the filters are only good for 3,000."
"Well, that's the weak link in the chain, isn't it?"
So, how's your bracket? That's the question we're supposed to be asking everyone. How's your bracket? I'm guessing that if we couldn't gamble on this NCAA tournament, there would be as little interest in it as watching a compost pile. Mine is fine, by the way. Thanks for asking.
Suddenly, in the wake of the Natasha Richardson death, Canadians are pondering a helmet requirement for skiers. One would think that celebrity deaths are more important than other deaths, wouldn't one?
TORONTO – Quebec is considering making helmets mandatory on ski slopes following the death of actress Natasha Richardson and after doctors tried to persuade the province's sports minister to do it. Richardson was not wearing a helmet when she fell Monday while taking a beginners ski course in Quebec. The New York City medical examiner's office said she died Wednesday of blunt impact to the head.
Between 1990 and 2008, at least 39 people died on Quebec's ski slopes, the provincial coroner's office said. A report released last year suggested that of the 26 deaths between 1990 and 2004, 14 were the result of head injuries. Helmets were worn in just two of those 14 cases.
So, we are led to believe that the 39 people who died prior to the celebrity accident were not worthy of prompting such a radical change in Canadian law.
I suppose it takes a celebrity to make us realize that something is wrong. Otherwise, when it's only a "regular person" who dies, we needn't rush to make any changes. Celebrities are more important.
That's what we're saying.