The NFL - Our 51st State
The National Football League is moving closer to world domination every day. Forget about the crisis in the Middle East and the threat of terrorism, the real threat to our way of life is coming from the NFL.
The top-rated TV show last week was Sunday night's Manning vs. Manning match-up on NBC, with 15,730,000 viewers nationwide. Seven of the top 20 programs last week were NFL games or pre-games.
There is an entire network devoted to the games, called appropriately, the NFL Network. Hey, nobody said they were creative geniuses, just bent on world domination.
There are games on Saturday, Sunday, Monday and Thursday. This Thanksgiving there are 3 games on, instead of the usual 2, because you can't have a holiday without 24-hour football.
Tuesday at 10am, the Philadelphia Eagles drove another nail into my cynical coffin. They placed on sale an additional 1,500 seats for each home game. Eagles games are sold-out, and season tickets are harder to come by than Elton John's girlfriends. Seriously, there is a 50,000 person waiting list to get them, so figure out how many people have to die for someone to get to #1 on the list. If I was a security guard looking for terrorists, I'd check the 50,000th guy on the waiting list and check his house for anthrax. One good dose would wipe out a lot of the fans ahead of him on the list - but I shouldn't give him any ideas.
Two interesting things about the additional tickets:
1 - They were standing-room tickets, which means you would have to find your own spot and hope that you were taller than the guy in front of you.
2 - They were priced at $50 each. To stand. For the record, that meant an extra $600,000 in ticket revenue for the team (12,000 tickets x $50), and they did nothing but provide a ticket. No seat, no luxury box ... only the priviledge of attending the game and the work of finding a place to stand. Suckers. I'll watch the game on TV - seated.
Even more interestingly (3), the tickets sold out quickly - 7 minutes, according to reports, and several scalping web sites had the tickets for sale 4 hours before they were available - for $185 each. Go figure. After all that, what motivation does the team have to (God forbid) maintain the price of tickets (or even lower them) if they know that people will overpay for them? For that matter, why even have seats?
Two interesting things about the additional tickets:
1 - They were standing-room tickets, which means you would have to find your own spot and hope that you were taller than the guy in front of you.
2 - They were priced at $50 each. To stand. For the record, that meant an extra $600,000 in ticket revenue for the team (12,000 tickets x $50), and they did nothing but provide a ticket. No seat, no luxury box ... only the priviledge of attending the game and the work of finding a place to stand. Suckers. I'll watch the game on TV - seated.
Even more interestingly (3), the tickets sold out quickly - 7 minutes, according to reports, and several scalping web sites had the tickets for sale 4 hours before they were available - for $185 each. Go figure. After all that, what motivation does the team have to (God forbid) maintain the price of tickets (or even lower them) if they know that people will overpay for them? For that matter, why even have seats?
TICKET MANAGER: Did you see the prices of those standing room tickets?
OWNER: Yes. Strange, isn't it? People will pay even if they don't have a seat.
TICKET MANAGER: Right. Maybe we could yank out all the seats and jam another 10,000 people in the stadium? If they don't want to sit down, why should we help them?
OWNER: That's a good point. If we take the seats out for next year, and reduce the price by $5, they'll think they're getting a bargain! We'll make even more money [rubbing hands with glee].
TICKET MANAGER: I'll order a hundred wrenches and get some homeless people to help, like we did when we had that snowstorm a couple years ago.
OWNER: Hell of an idea. Give them gloves this time.
Meanwhile, the NFL stands by and watches it, padding their pockets.
OWNER: Yes. Strange, isn't it? People will pay even if they don't have a seat.
TICKET MANAGER: Right. Maybe we could yank out all the seats and jam another 10,000 people in the stadium? If they don't want to sit down, why should we help them?
OWNER: That's a good point. If we take the seats out for next year, and reduce the price by $5, they'll think they're getting a bargain! We'll make even more money [rubbing hands with glee].
TICKET MANAGER: I'll order a hundred wrenches and get some homeless people to help, like we did when we had that snowstorm a couple years ago.
OWNER: Hell of an idea. Give them gloves this time.
Meanwhile, the NFL stands by and watches it, padding their pockets.
Comments
no worries about standing room only tix in this neck of the woods, i hear! lol!
It really is big business isn't it? That is saddening but I enjoy college football. In Canaada you can easily see a college game...but I think here they are even more popular than pro?
In college...I heard something from my anthropology prof that changed my lack of interest ins ports. I'm not really a sports person, although like any good Candian hockey is a way of life. A religion you could say, like baseball here...
But my prof said...sports is the marriage of art and war.
and I came tos ee that sports are better than war, but with the same kind of commitment and passion perhaps...? Still I don't like the big business aspect. If you could...would you love to go games?
(p.s.Two articles you might find interesting...about ethanol and farming...)
http://www.smithsonianmagazine.com/issues/2006/july/presence.php
http://www.agron.iastate.edu/courses/agron342/diamondmistake.html
The opiate of the masses, and if they didn't want it, it wouldn't be offered. Just the same, how can someone watch 8 games at once?
I'm tellin' ya -- future generations will have eyes that move independently like lizards. We adapt to our surroundings.
They e-mail him a schedule every friday. He gets so excited...it's kinda cute. so we just let him have his fun ;-)!