Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Next on the list...

When is a free DVD not free? When you're a member of the Columbia House DVD club.
GO PAPERLESS! No more order cards and catalogs! they proclaim, (exclamation points) and "we'll reward you with a FREE DVD from a selection of hot titles." uh-huh.
The fine print.
A shipping and processing fee will be added to your FREE selection.
I suppose by putting the word free in capital letters, then charging you a shipping and processing fee (not free, fee) it somehow makes it right. Imagine a world where retailers actually sent you something for free and didn't charge you for shipping. The horror! Is there another meaning for free that I've missed?
Those "hot titles" include "Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium", "Shrek 2", "Garfield 3" (a close game), "Evan Almighty" and "X-Men 3." Hot.
I don't know how much the shipping and processing fee is, but I'd bet it's just about the price of the DVD if you bought it at an actual retail store.
I also don't know how I got roped into this Columbia House DVD club. I was probably drunk and thought it sounded like a good idea to pay retail price plus shipping and processing for a DVD that I could rent from Netflix for about one-eighth of the price. The evils of alcohol.
So, I said goodbye to Columbia House and their paperless billing. But not so fast, Goober. It isn't as easy as clicking on the "Buy Now" link or the "Go to Cart" or even going paperless. No, you have to scroll through a bunch of junk in the Membership guide at the bottom of the screen. Keep scrolling ... there it is.
They tell you:
... you are free to cancel your membership any time after you've fulfilled your purchase commitment by writing to us at: Customer Service Department, Columbia House DVD Club, PO Box 91602, Indianapolis, IN 46291-0602.
Free to cancel? Can we really be sure, or will they charge a processing fee?
I will find out. My free cancellation has so far cost me 42 cents.

8 comments:

kimmyk said...

i use to do columbia house music and dvd years ago. i kept my contract cause i remember getting great deals on movies for the kids. well, now i have a shit ton of kids dvds in the basement and no kids to watch them. i need to pawn them off on my niece...

not too many things in life are free. i was half tempted today to order abbie's proactive face cleaner when i was watching late night tv cause it came with free green tea moisturizer AND free shipping and handling. how great is that?!?! super great!! but then there was this lil' blurb about how they had auto shipping so they would ship automatically ever month and bill my credit card. and then the free part stopped there.

kimmyk said...

i have a question for ya---

does the title of this post mean you're going to be getting a few things off your chest in the future? like you're checking things off a list one at a time.

if that's the case, throw a feel good story (make it up if you have to) in there every once in a while. there's a lot of bitching going on around the internet these days---it's starting to get depressing even in my make believe world of blogging.

Kate Michele said...

Don't take this the wrong way but I didn't even know these club things still existed! HeeHee

Kimmy: doesn't proactive dry abbies face out? Did mine...you should try Murad... Its a wonder. More expensive but so much gentler and far more effective. :D

Anthony did u know when I was in the 6th grade I had an account through BMG I believe it was. So see I know what they are I just didn't think they were around anymore lol

Xoxoxox

kimmyk said...

KM-Abbie's never used it before. She just wants me to buy it cause everyone says it works so great. Thanks for the heads up on the Murad. I'll Google that now.

Anthony said...

Kimmy: As for a "feel good story," we'll see which way the wind blows.
I wrote this right after my explosion on TurboTax, so "next" might be last, I don't know.

Firestarter5 said...

Columbia House...isn't that Latin for stay the hell away?

Anthony said...

It is now.

Anonymous said...

on proactive...You can get the same stuff for a lot less. Check out the ingredients and look for it at your grocery store. My son has some stuff that was way cheaper.