The Phone Police

As many of you know, it's a short walk from my home to the grocery store. Being so, I usually make 8 to 10 trips a week because I'm cheap and I shop on impulse.

Today, on my way home, I spied a driver at the traffic light (yes, there's one of those) yakking on his cellular telephone. As many of you know, this I believe is a bane on our existence.

As he turned the corner I shouted, "Get off the phone!" He stopped, which was odd because I figured he couldn't hear me over the din of his conversation.

"What did you say?" he asked, in a tone which conferred that he knew exactly what I said.

"Get off the phone," I replied, figuring that I'm just big enough to be mildly intimidating and still remembered that I'm carrying a 10-pound bag of cat litter which can also be used as a weapon.

"What are you, the phone police?" he asked, begging the reply.

"Yes I am. Now shut up and drive."

To protect and serve.