One wins, one falls down.

Walk much? Apparently not. Crystle Stewart, who became Miss USA because there is obviously no "walking" competition, became the second Miss Universe contestant to fall down in an evening gown during the competition. The fact that there is a Miss Universe at all still amazes me, let alone the fact that we're such egomaniacs that we believe that, in the entire Universe, there isn't a more beautiful woman than the one we pick.
Actually, the fact that there are beauty contests at all amazes me. In a country where you get in trouble for talking about how people look, we still feel like we can arbitrate a contest between women of different countries. Find an Aborigine and ask him who he thinks is the most beautiful woman in the world. Who are the judges? Old white men and women? It's just ridiculous.

Meanwhile, in Ohio (where they wobble but don't fall down) the Miss Universe of golf, Paula Creamer managed to take a first-round score of 60 and hang on by her teeth skin to win the (ready?) Jamie Farr Owens-Corning Classic Presented by Kroger. She fended off a Taiwanese and a South Korean - no mean feat - to win for the third time this year. Big deal, right? Yeah, I know. Stuff like that keeps me indoors much more than it should.

I'm seeing a lot more bicyclists on the road than I used to. Regular bikes, not those crazy things we ride. High gas prices have turned people back into their garages to pull out the old, dry-rotted-tire bicycle. Apparently, they have a bike but no bike helmet, which no bicycle should be sold without. I suppose it's "geeky" to ride with a helmet, I don't know. I think it's equally geeky to ride in the back of an ambulance, too. As long as there are cars on the road I'll wear a helmet. They outweigh me by about 5,000 pounds and even though I'm not a doctor, I'm pretty sure that my head meeting concrete is a losing proposition.
I think it's all part of that "You can't tell me what to do" mentality that keeps people talking on cell phones and smoking cigarettes. I'd be curious to know how many of these "my body-myself" people oppose abortion or think that capital punishment is a good idea.
Of course, you can take the opposite side and say that the more of these people who kill themselves with cigarettes and head trauma are participating in the time-honored process of natural selection, where the dopes and weaklings are weeded out of society to make more room for the rest of us.
The good news is that parking spaces will be easier to find and movie lines will be shorter.