Saturday, September 1, 2007

I'm either up late or awake early

A long time ago, somebody said something about getting to bed early, and how it makes you want to get up early, and that somehow it's a good idea. As for me, whenever I go to bed early, it just makes me get up at some ridiculous hour because my body clock isn't accustomed to doing something that people did in the 19th Century. I was in bed at 9:30pm and now it's 3:25am. It figures, because I'm usually in bed around midnight and getting up at 6, so I guess mathematically it works out. I'm lucky to have the blog because otherwise, I'd be out roaming the streets. For now, I'll have to settle for roaming the Internet.
As it turns out, some folks are into out of shape strippers. I'm wondering if I've missed a potential career path. Why bother trying to stay in shape when I can eat Tacos and get paid to have women put money in my crotch? What a waste of time college was. There's probably a very narrow demographic for women who want to see fat naked men, but really - how much do you really have to work? Two or three parties a week should be enough to keep you going. Plus, that fast food is kinda cheap, so it isn't like you'd be shopping at the Whole Foods or anything. Every dollar in your pants is another ninety-nine cent Big Mac in your belly. I think my stripper name would be Chubsy-Ubsy. Or Pat Magroin.
Elsewhere on the site, they say that they can Tape Your Party!!! A Tasteful Temptations Camera Man can Tape your whole party or event. We can make make copies for everyone there!!!
First, let me say that I'm a big fan of the multiple exclamation points. As for the party, why not make as many copies as possible? Make one for you, your wife or girlfriend and her lawyer. Once it becomes entered as evidence, it becomes property of the state and you will need another copy, so make an extra one for yourself.

I could go on rambling, but it's 3:45 now, and I just watched this video on YouTube, and now I need to get some rest ...


Kate Michele said...

Ummm why were you even looking up out of shape strippers? Haha.

Damn I could do that! Earn a little extra...i mean i probably wouldn't have to leave to go to my 'party' till after chad gets i won't have to pay for child care...haha. Want to be my bouncer?

Ladyred said...

Yea I was wondering that too Kate. Don't go to bed early A, it makes you do things that you normally wouldn't. Unless of course you normally check up on out of shape strippers? Who am I to judge??

kimmyk said...

that poor girl. geez louise.

okay, what time did you go to bed last night? are you up now? it's 9am on sunday. if i go to bed early i just sleep til my normal time. everyday last week my doctor said "lookin rough today kim, you awake?" i had dark circles apparently. i dont know how to get rid of 'em. last night i slept 8 hours but i was still tired this morning. today will be a nap day.

Anthony said...

Painful, wasn't it? She later said that she was so stage-struck that she didn't even hear the question. I wish I didn't hear the answer.

If you're sleeping enough but waking up tired, maybe your mattress is the problem. If it's more than 10 years old, it might be time for a new one.