Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Don't just do something, stand there.

1. A stage in a sequence of events at which the trend of all future events, for better or for worse, is determined; turning point.
2. A condition of instability or danger, as in social, economic, political or international affairs, leading to a decisive change.
3. A dramatic emotional or circumstantial upheaval in a person’s life.

Gasoline is four dollars a gallon. It’s a real crisis, folks. It must be, because the media tells us it is. End of the world, fire and brimstone stuff. It’s the sort of thing that they make movies and write books about. It’s so bad that we’ve decided to change our way of life and make difficult choices. Or not. Mostly, I’m seeing the “or not” option. We’re loath to change because we feel it’s tantamount to someone telling us what to do and we don’t like that. We like to complain and we’re good at it. “Do something!” we scream to whoever will listen. Generally there isn’t anyone listening, which makes us scream louder.

I haven’t affected any drastic changes. Partly because I don’t feel the need and partly because I don’t know how much difference it makes. One percent here, one percent there - it’s pennies on the dollar. I don't use the air conditioner on my morning drive. Instead, I run the defroster on the cold setting. It keeps me comfortable, since the sun isn't shining at 7am. Beyond that, I'm a conservative driver most of the time, so I'm still doing the same things I was doing when gasoline was a dollar a gallon. I get passed when the light turns green, drivers zoom past me only to move in front of me to use the next highway exit and I still see a large number of people in "drive thru" lanes with their engines idling even though they could speed their trip by parking and going inside.

Our local supermarket proclaims a “fire lane” in front of the store. There’s no parking, but people circumvent the law by staying in their idling vehicles while their lazy counterparts run in for a “few things.” Never mind that there are parking spaces. Those are at least a hundred feet from the store and God forbid our precious fat asses move from an actual parking space to the store. We like convenience and we’ll spend and do what is necessary in order to achieve it.

Unfortunately, that's true of the speedy-lane changing-hard accelerating-hard braking drivers who are the majority. Old habits die hard and I think most people feel they're entitled to be wasteful, as though it were some sort of American birthright. They'd rather complain than change, because in order to change you have to want to change.

They also want to complain. Complaining is more fun, and we’re all about fun.


kimmyk said...

as much as you fuss these days anthony-



i'm just kiddin.

get this the other day i'm goin to the grocery store-and my store just put two stop signs in the cross walk areas to make people stop-so i stop at the first one, roll up to the second one and i'm sitting behind this car waiting for it to go...it doesn't. middle of the road just sitting there. so i stop yakkin' at abbie for five mins and realize there is no one in the car-but someone in the passenger seat just lookin around like a dorkass...so i go around and sure enough-driver is gone, car is running and passenger in the seat is this older lady just lookin at me like i did somethin to her.

i park and go in the store and i'm lookin at seedless watermelon (5.99-robbery!) so this chick walks away from starbucks, which is like right inside the produce area and goes and gets in that car.

can you fucking believe that shit? bitch is gettin a gadamn coffee parked in the fire lane in the middle of the crosswalk area.

i think that's at least 2 tickets dont you?

she's lucky i dont condone road rage or who knows what i woulda done!

*ramble over*

Anthony said...

Well, I see that grocery stores in OH aren't all that different from stores here - except the Starbucks. No SBUX in grocery's here.

Sometimes, I think I should be one of those local vigil ante's who runs over there and takes photos of violators and sends them to the local police. They'd write me up in the paper and stuff. Trouble is, I have a real job and a (sort of) life which keeps me from devoting the requisite amount of time to the project.

But I could hire a kid.

kimmyk said...

and let a kid take all the credit?
are you kiddin me??

no. if anyone takes credit it should be you.

maybe you could get a receipt pad and write your own tickets? ya know walk around on your bike and scribble shit on a pad and put it under their wipers?

that'll make think twice of ever doing it again i bet...and then that my friend is a win win situation.

Anthony said...

After that guy last week asked me if I was "the cell phone police" I guess it would fit my job description.

Possible sticker options:



I'll work on it.

Kate Michele said...

I for one like the Park and Walk one.

are you taking votes?

Yesterday i saw someone park in a handicap space had a sticker and all but was just fine as far as I could see...

Anthony said...

Fat ass is usually a pretty good guess, even though I can't see it.

People around here pull a lot of scams to get those mirror-hanging handicapped parking things.
Sometimes I think the handicap is mental.

Handsome B. Wonderful said...

I walk into fast food joints most of the time. I started doing it because I get stressed out with the drive-thru. But now I do it for the gas savings like you.