What's on TV?

Imagine my surprise. They held the Miss America pageant at some point over the weekend. Was it on TV? Maybe it was on that Country Music Channel? I only know because I happened to stumble across an article on page A8 of the local newspaper. I remember a time when the result was front page news, with a big color photo. Now, there's barely a blurb and I couldn't tell you the name of the winner, except that I think she is from Michigan. The times are changing for the better. Maybe next year I can write that they skipped the stupid thing altogether.

Meanwhile, some men are figure skating in Minnesota tonight. Men figure skating. Any competition that involves the words "men" and "choreography" are great reasons to tune away. I watched long enough for the commentator (a woman) to spout something about the next skater doing a "Quad jump", and how he nailed it in practice, so we'd better be sure to watch carefully. He fell on his skinny ass. Next.

The NHL All-Star game is on Versus, which is second to the Country Music Channel for exciting broadcasts. This one involves men skating, but the only choreography is in the fact that they don't hit each other. It's hockey, sanitized for your protection. They scored 8 goals in two periods, which is about 6 more than they score in regular games. I think the blue team was ahead, but I don't know who was on the blue team, so I'm skipping it.

The Screen Actors Guild was giving out some awards over on TBS. I know that, because all day the little dancing icon that disturbs my viewing said, "SAG Awards Tonight at 8". From the looks of the first three awards, it was becoming a Sopranos tribute show. I've never seen an episode of The Sopranos, so the luster was lost on me. They've won for best actor, best actress and best ensemble cast so far. If they win for best Comedy, I'm writing a letter to somebody.

Can I get a refund from my cable company?