Attention whores.

I have a day off work today, thanks to several American presidents, for whom the day is dedicated. Mostly though, it's a day for selling stuff. Five years ago I purchased an automobile on this day and I'm proud to say it's still running. The interesting thing about Presidents' Day (if there is an interesting thing about it) is that the day is meant to honor all presidents, even the lousy ones. It's quite the holiday that doesn't distinguish between creeps, scoundrels and incompetents and says, "Nice job guys! Even though some of you sucked."

I could spend the day watching the daytime coverage of the Winter Olympics. Or not. It strikes me as a big attention grab. People that we don't see for 4 years are all of a sudden in the public eye and they seem determined to bicker, complain and otherwise shine a light on themselves whether we like it or not.

A snowboarder named Nate Holland is complaining because the other snowboarders' pants are too tight. He said he is worried about "the integrity of the sport." Right.

The Chinese speed skating team is fighting with the Korean team. One of the Chinese delegation was seen videotaping the Korean practice, and this angered the Koreans to the point that one of them threw a water bottle at the cameraman. What's to see? Skinny Asians skating in a circle. Another big training secret unearthed.

Then, of course, there is Hannah Teter and Lindsey Vonn - a couple of skiers who posed in bathing suits for Sports Illustrated. The skiing community is outraged. I think it's great. Not only for the photos, but for the fact that two weeks ago we couldn't have picked Hannah Teter and Lindsey Vonn out of a police lineup.

The Canadian Women's hockey team beat Slovakia 18-0 and that angered the hockey people. Who it should have angered was Slovakia, who stink at hockey to the point that they shouldn't be involved in the Olympic games.

And of course, the death of luging legend Nodar Kumaritashvili was shown on television news broadcasts, and the luging community ... oh ... people are outraged. I suppose the problem is that it happened in practice and wasn't on live television, so now that the news broadcasts picked it up it isn't supposed to be on television. That makes good nonsense. If he had merely been paralyzed or seriously injured it would have been a nice piece of journalism. But since he died it is now considered in bad taste to show the video.

Meanwhile, (and here comes the Presidents' Day tie-in) how many times have we seen the Zapruder film, where President John F. Kennedy gets a couple of bullets in his head? Have you ever heard any complaints about showing that? It's a luge, for Chrissakes.

I don't understand you people sometimes.