$33 a minute.

I watch a lot of baseball on TV. During the summer there isn't much else worth watching unless you enjoy watching the Mythbusters crew build a 7-foot Lego ball that amounted to a rolling anti-climax. But I digress.

One of the things I see during the games are the incessant cell phone geeks on either side of the baselines calling their pals to let them know that they're goofy smiling faces are on the TV:

Cell Phone Geek: Hey, can you see me? Wait ... I'll wave. [waving]

Friend at home: Oh, is that you? You're a little blurry. Wait ... OK, keep waving so I can tell if it's you. OK ... now I see you. Wave some more.

Cell Phone Geek: I'm still waving. Can you see me now? Oh ... something happened. No, there I am again, right?
Friend at home: Yes, I can see you now. I just turned the game on. Who's winning?
Cell Phone Geek: Oh ... I don't know. I was calling people.

Friend at home: Great. All right then, let me get back to the Mythbusters. They're going to roll a 7-foot Lego ball down a hill into a car. You're breaking up. They're doing some construction work nearby, so it might sound like I'm hanging up, but just keep waving and I'll tell you when to stop.

Meanwhile, President Obama did nearly an hour on TV last night telling us how he's doing. I'm guessing that the networks weren't all that happy about it. According to the latest ad pricing data from Nielsen, the Wednesday slot between 8 p.m. and 9 p.m. generates some $21.5 million for the big four. That's probably why Fox denied his request for air time. It might be counter-productive in "this economy" to ask big media outlets to give up the millions of dollars that The New Adventures of Old Christine could be bringing in so that he can notify the country that he's finished 100 days as president. I thought that's what C-Span was for.

NEW YORK – Of all the veteran actors with films at the Tribeca Film Festival, the length of Sasha Grey's filmography could rival them all. Though just 21, Grey has performed in more than 150 pornographic films. But at Tribeca, she stars in Steven Soderbergh's "The Girlfriend Experience" - which premiered with much anticipation at the festival Tuesday evening.
In it, Grey plays a $2,000-an-hour escort whose Manhattan customers are mostly Wall Street executives stressed by their falling fortunes.

Amidst the furor over the $2,600 seats behind home plate at Yankee games, I never hear anyone complain about paying a hooker two-grand for an hour of sex. The Yankees have been under fire because most of the expensive seats at their new Yankee Stadium have gone unsold, to the extent that they have lowered prices and offered extra tickets for the few who have shelled out hooker prices for a game ticket.

I can't help but draw a comparison between the price of a baseball game and the price of an hour with a hooker, and I couldn't tell you that either one would be worth the money, although either one of them is a better bargain than an hour of network air time.

Prostitution and pornography are huge industries in America, yet they fly under the radar of public outrage. Occasionally, we'll hear Congress debating the logic of having consumers pay sales tax for Internet purchases. Lately, the fire has been burning under the Yankees' ass to get them to bring ticket prices back to earthly levels.

Stop a random person on the street and ask them what an hour of sex would cost and chances are you'd get a range of answers and almost none of them would be close. When you told them that it would cost two grand, they'd be incredulous, but since the industry isn't regulated (like television and baseball) there isn't anyone to complain to. If you complain, you're assumed to have broken the law and seen as a horrible person - because you've succumbed to your base instincts. You remember those. The ones that the drug companies tell you that you are supposed to succumb to and "ask your doctor" if a 4-hour erection requires medical attention.

There isn't anything you can do about it, because talking about it makes you the worst person in the community.