Thursday, May 24, 2007

Fixing America's great shortages

My fellow Americans, our long national nightmare is over.
- Gerald R. Ford, August 9, 1974
Television has answered the call, and has created yet another celebrity in a nation where there are so few of them that people will spend countless hours in front of the TV and countless dollars on the telephone voting to decide. Supposedly, the votes were counted and we were led to believe that the nationwide call narrowed the field down to a high-school kid and another guy with skunk-streaked hair and a gimmick. America has settled for the 17-year old, and they seemingly could not be happier. I, on the other hand, bewail the sorry state of entertainment that allows hard working entertainers to wallow in anonymity while a kid who shows up for a TV program is instantly gratified. "It turned out pretty cool," she said. No kidding, kid.
What American Idol does, in the final analysis is prove that there is indeed no accounting for tastes. There is, however, accounting for the dollars that the show brings in, which - final analysis-wise; does matter.

Meanwhile, you cannot get blood from a stone – or some men, for that matter…

WASHINGTON - Gay men remain banned for life from donating blood, the government said Wednesday, leaving in place — for now — a 1983 prohibition meant to prevent the spread Of HIV through transfusions. They also reiterated that if you have used intravenous drugs or been paid for sex you are likewise permanently barred from donating blood.
While I realize that there is a nationwide blood shortage, I am nevertheless squeamish about needles and lying around for 15 minutes with one jabbed in my arm. Although I am one of those universal donors, I have only given a couple of times, and it is a rather unpleasant experience for me. Having led a rather clean life for the past 5 decades, I cannot dodge the issue with any illicit lifestyle choices or sexual dalliances. There is one that I may need to reconsider, however … being paid for sex. Count me in. I hope.
The bidding starts at one dollar.

6 comments:

kimmyk said...

Do you do windows? Cause I'll go a buck fifty if you do my windows. I'll pass on the sex cause I pass on it here when I get it for free ya know..so thanks but no thanks, but seriously think about the windows.

*waving dollar bill*

Kate Michele said...

Haha Kimmy!!

Ok so my thought on this gay man ban for giving blood is this: How do you know they're gay? I mean they don't have to stand right up and tell you.... whats it gonna become Nazi Germany with arm bands? This is a slippery slope (pun not intended).....

I am well aware of the shortage and the risk of blood donors, but....

Now on to this paying for sex thing: can I see a resume with your special skills on it please? ;)

Anthony said...

The gay thing is one of the questions they ask when you donate blood. "Have you ever...?" I suppose one could lie.

Hmmm ... the special skills. Sounds like a potential blog post. Once upon a time, I was told that I could not possibly be as good at "something" as I said I was, and that a man had never done "this" to her and "satisfied" her. Needless to say...

...I think I should have been given a major award for that, and they could keep the one at school.

Anyway, K8tie - I thought you had a drawer full of batteries! ;-)

Kate Michele said...

I do but now you have my interest peeked.... Hmmmmm I'll go five and you don't even have to do my windows in less ya wanna...hahaha.

Sparky Duck said...

Preston and Steve are giving away Def Leappord tix for a pint of blood. Their is your opening, Plymouth Meeting mall aint that far

Anthony said...

5 it is, k8tie.

Def Leppard, eh? How about for a cup of urine? :)
For blood, they're going to have to up the ante to Kings of Leon tix.