Friday, December 8, 2006

Random Musings

Frosty the Snowman. What a miserable holiday song that is. They tell us he's a "jolly, happy soul", then he dies in a horrible heat-related incident involving some kids and a corncob pipe. And why didn't that cop help him when he stopped them? I want answers! Either way, I think those kids are in for a horrible experience someday...
But he waved goodbye
Saying "Don't you cry
I'll be back again some day".
Watch your backs, kids. I think he's still carrying that broomstick around. Frosty bastard. I never trusted him. Stupid eyes made out of coal follow me around...

Actor Jamie Kennedy arrives at an awards ceremony in Burbank, California wearing a pair of women's panties on his head and holding up a sign that reads: "I found Brittney's Panties".

I'm only including this for the Google searches...

NEW DELHI (Reuters) - Condoms designed to meet international size specifications are too big for many Indian men as their penises fall short of what manufacturers had anticipated, an Indian study has found. Initial findings from a two-year study showed 60 percent of men in the financial capital Mumbai had penises about 2.4 cm (one inch) shorter than those condoms catered for. For a further 30 percent, the difference was at least 5 cm (two inches).

Japanese pianist Maiko Ichiyanagi poses with the world's smallest grand piano produced by Japan's toy maker Sega Toys. It has 88 working keys and can automatically play 100 pre-installed music songs, will go on sale 01 April 2007 with a price of 47,000 yen ($400 US).

That would never sell in India.

To play it, you'd need a 10-inch pianist.

OK, now back to your business...

Last night on my favorite TV show, My Name is Earl, a doctor was played by William Schallert, who was the dad on The Patty Duke Show. It doesn't take much to get me to thinking about junk, and this is a prime example.

On the show, Patty plays identical cousins, Patty Lane and Cathy Lane. Patty is the Brooklyn kid and Cathy is from Great Britian. We are asked to buy into the premise that they are identical cousins, because their fathers are identical twins. I have a question. How does a person have an identical cousin? The show's explanation is full of holes, if you ask me (and you didn't).

The answer I gave myself was that dad (William Schallert) had an affair with Cathy's mom (his brother's wife) while he was serving in the military overseas. Then, he comes back and has a child with his wife. Or, maybe Cathy's dad knocked up Patty's mom while he was here on vacation? Viola, Identical cousins. Whatever it is, I didn't buy into that stupid idea in 1965, and I'm not buying into it now. One pair of matching bookends, different as night and day. Yeah, sure ... that Lane family sounds a little odd to me...I never trusted them. I'll bet a hot dog made her mom lose control, too ... if you know what I mean...



And, for some real entertainment, there's always David Letterman:

6 comments:

kimmyk said...

I love me some frosty!

Thank you for reason number uno on my list of why I will never date an Indian man. I'm not prejudice, but I gotta draw the line somewhere.

Kate Michele said...

Frosty? Did someone say Frosty? As in Wendy's frosty's???

This condom thing leaves me with one question...What's the national adverage? Like 7in.????

Stephanie said...

As the mother of identical twin girls, I have done some research...

If identical twin boys marry identical twin boys, genetically, all the children will be siblings. But the chance of identical "cousins" is not possible since one egg cannot split when in 2 different wombs.

Anthony said...

OK ... Who wants to help Katie with her numbers?

Where's that Firestarter guy when I need him?

Kate Michele said...

What am I off??? Too much or Too little???

Pam said...

Well, I just had to research it, since in my somewhat limited experience 7 in seems a bit on the "above average" side of things ;-). This link says: "Although most studies in this area vary slightly in the findings, the average erect penis length is 5.5 to 6.5 inches, and the average circumference is 4.5 to 5 inches."

You wouldn't know it from the "testers" in the above post though. Those are "off the chart," I do believe.