Thursday, April 7, 2011

Do not disturb the intervention.

I watch that "Intervention" TV show once in a while. It's always the same three things:

  • Crack or heroin addiction
  • A guy who drinks too much
  • Some eating disorder – generally not eating enough

That's the Intervention Trifecta. Of course, there are the rare occurances of combinations of the three – in pairs or all three. For instance, a crack-addicted alcoholic anorexic. That's a series.

It is kind of boring seeing the same problems over and over. They end the same way: They follow the guy around for a while, watching him stumble, shoot-up or throw up for a few weeks (that's called enabling) and then assemble the family so that they can get that bald-headed psychiatrist to tell him how screwed up his life is and send him off to a 3-week rehab in Florida. Some of us would view that as a paid vacation.

Then, one of his family members (usually a displaced uncle or some grandparent who he pissed on a few times) gets up and reads a heart-felt letter of regret and how ashamed they are of his screwed-up life. So much so, that they have decided to put him on display.

What the show should be doing is helping someone who can help others by changing his life. Alcoholics who sit at home and swill gin aren't hurting anyone but themselves. Crack addicts die in an alley. The show needs to do more good for society in general and stop focusing on the addict.

They could do a show about a guy with really smelly feet. Or a Dallas Cowboys fan who lives in Philadelphia. Gather the family around and scold somebody because they don't know what a Yield sign means. Or a guy who refuses to shovel his sidewalk when it snows or leaves piles of snow on top of his car and drives around. Get them straightened out.

Imagine a tear-stained aunt holding up a pair of brown loafers exclaiming, "See what you're doing to us!" Their family dinners have been ruined by his foul and unpleasant odor. "You're tearing us apart!" They could even bring in a few shoe salesmen that have had to lean over his feet.

Help us, television.

2 comments:

Handsome B. Wonderful said...

Notice they have no "interventions" over marijuana? I think that says something about marijuana and whether or not to legalize it. It's much less of a problem, as you know, than alcohol.

Anthony said...

Absolutely. Comics make jokes about pot, but rarely about anything stronger.
Even among adults, smoking pot or getting high is a "wink and a smile" topic.

Chances are, if some of those heroin or crack addicts had turned to pot, their families would probably see it as an improvement in their behavior.