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Joe Cartoon

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Thursday Thirteen v.7

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Thirteen Things That Scare Me a Little The Christmas decorations are up at the local mall, but never mind that. Tuesday is Hallowe'en. 1. Any letter from my Condo Association. It makes my heart skip a beat. Usually it's something really stupid that I'm not doing. Tell the people who are doing it and leave me alone. 2. Spam e-mail with T.M.I. I recently got a Spam message that contained my first and last name, from a Landon Nicholson (no relation) telling me that "Your history shows that your Viagra prescription is ready to be re-filled." Uh-huh. My personal history shows that I need Viagra like I need a hair dryer and a comb. 3. When the Boss says, "You got a minute?" He never calls me in to chit-chat. 4. Dying alone. I don't need to elaborate on that, except to say that if I needed Viagra, I wouldn't be worried about it. 5. George W. Bush with his hand on the Bible. I keep waiting for it to burst into flames . 6. My spin instructo...
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It's enough already with the guns.

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This story broke during the day on Monday. Briefly: Two shooting incidents on the Virginia Tech campus today have left 33 dead. Thirty-one, including the gunman, died at Norris Hall; two died at West Ambler Johnston Hall. Fifteen other victims from Norris are being treated at area hospitals. The VT campus is beautiful. I was there about 12 years ago on my way home from Tennessee. The buildings are beautiful grey stone that they call Hokie Stone , which is a variety of limestone that they have been using since 1901. It is quite striking against the green Virginia landscape. Until today, it was the most memorable thing about the school. When I got home from work, I switched on the TV, and up came the BBC News, which is on one of the cable outlets here. The reporter seemed incredulous that such a thing could happen. As a journalist, I could tell that he was challenged, both by Great Britain's attitude toward handguns and his own. He was professional enough to allow it to be a mere ...
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Thursday Thirteen v.5

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Thirteen Times I Needed a Delorian ...and some Plutonium. Times of regret - we all have them. So, let's get in the Delorian, crank it up to 85mph and take care of all of those "Biff" moments that would change my life for the better. Here are 13 things I would go back in time and change. Screw the space-time continum, I want to be happy now . 1. My wedding day. October 13, 1990. To stop it before it got out of hand. Mostly, I felt badly for the guests who gave up a perfectly good Saturday to attend and buy a gift, and I missed my 15-year high school reunion. She has been gone since 1996, but I did get a nice cat out of the deal, so it wasn't a total loss. 2. Buying those shoes. What was I thinking? They weren't going to fit any better at home than they did at the store. Is the air pressure different in shoe stores than it is at home, that makes my feet shrink? I have more shoes that I don't wear than ones that I do. A word of advice: Never buy shoes from a m...
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