My One-Year Old

When I was here, where were you? Chances are you weren't here, since I was kind of talking to myself then, as opposed to now when I'm answering myself, too. Anyway, why do I ask?

Because it's my one-year Blogger anniversary. One-year anniversaries seem to be the big deal around the Internet, so here is mine.

.

That reminds me of something mildly irritating:

A local TV news station does children's birthday photos on Saturday morning. They call it Baby's First Birthday or something like that. The point is, the kid is one year old, but it isn't his first birthday. His first birthday was the day he was born. This is his second birthday. Things like that bother me like a back itch.

And there you have pretty much what my blog is based on. Random junk that I think up and write down.

I remember agonizing over the name. Suffice it to say that after a lot of rejected ideas, I chose something that has a ring of truth and a hint of sarcasm.

Readers come and go, but I think Carmen gets the prize (if it can be considered that) for being here the longest. She must have a high threshold for pain.

So, here I go, on my second birthday, and God knows it isn't always easy, but you seem to hang in with my penchant for wordiness. I get lost in my own world. But it's all worthwhile when you can read crap like this:

.

I am still confounded by the arrogance of the local weather people, who today called for a 20% chance of rain. Twenty percent? What does that mean? Either you think it's going to rain or not. Twenty percent is bullshit.

or...

Whatever happened to the concept of turning the other cheek? I guess that doesn't apply if it's the cheek with the wallet in it.

or...

THE NINE-TENTHS AT THE END OF THE GASOLINE PRICE - Try this: Stop by your local gasoline emporium and ask for a gallon. See how much it costs and try to get your one-tenth of a cent change.

or...

I don't need to hear Jay-Z at Space Shuttle lift-off volume rolling through my neighborhood. Keep your stupid music to yourself.

or...

"99 Bottles of Beer" was Benjamin Franklin's choice for the National Anthem of the United States.

.

It is cathartic, though. Generally, it keeps me from jamming the sharp end of an ice pick in my head. On most days, that's a real benefit.

Happy Blogger Birthday, My Sick Mind.

.