Is Anybody Listening?

In between the "Messy Mix" (formerly known as the Blizzard of the Century) and the release of the new dollar coin falls something we humans refer to as St. Valentine's Day.

I work with "men" (quotation marks intentional) and every time one of these romantic secular holidays comes around, I marvel at their total lack of commitment. Whether it's Christmas, some anniversary, birthday or other such couples event, their cluelessness astounds me.

The general question: "What are you getting [her] for [event]?"

The general answer: "I don't know." FOLLOWED BY THE CHILDISH EYE-ROLL, DENOTING SOMETHING ALONG THE LINES OF FINISHING YOUR VEGETABLES.

Perhaps I shouldn't be so astounded, but my astonishment comes from the fact that they have been with this woman for enough time that an answer should come quickly, and the problem should not be what to do, but rather which of the many choices should they pick. Especially since these holidays do not just pop up. They are carefully planned Hallmark holidays, heavily advertised and promoted. I place their confusion in either of two categories:

(1) Being "men", they do not want to seem less manly to the other men by seeming to be able to pick out a proper way to celebrate the day, or...

(2) They aren't paying enough attention.

I pick #2.

Since life can be reduced to a Seinfeld episode, I turn to the one where Elaine is analyzing George's relationship with his girlfriend. When Elaine cannot figure out why George is with this girl, Jerry tells Elaine that "he doesn't like her as much as he likes it." There you have it. The little head thinking for the big head. Pay attention, men. It isn't that difficult.

Meanwhile, I will subdue my yearning to hit you with a chair, since some of us cannot be close to the one we love on Wednesday. Consider yourselves privileged, and stop whining about having to do something on these days and enjoy the fact that you have something to do. Ungrateful bastards.

Meanwhile...

Speaking of people who do not listen:

WASHINGTON - A new version of the dollar coin, paying tribute to American presidents, goes into general circulation Thursday. Even though doing away with the bill could save hundreds of millions of dollars each year in printing costs, there is no plan to scrap the bill in favor of the more durable coin. Two recent efforts to promote wide usage of a dollar coin proved unsuccessful. A quarter-century ago, it showed feminist Susan B. Anthony on the front; then one in 2000 featuring Sacagawea, the Shoshone Indian who helped guide the Lewis and Clark expedition.

Hoo-boy, another new dollar coin! They keep making these things, and we keep not using them. Most people would prefer that we do away with the penny, too. It costs more than a penny to make one, and other such coinage has been done away with, like the half-cent, three-cent nickel and two-cent piece - but the penny remains. It seems as if the people at the mint aren't listening, either...

U.S. Mint Director Edmund C. Moy said he was encouraged by the initial demand for the new coin.

Edmund ... another "man". Wake the f*** up. I wonder what he's getting his wife for Valentine's Day?

So, c'mon guys, a little effort, please. Don't make me have to hit you with a chair. For those of us who have spent the last eight of these holidays essentially alone, take it from me. It isn't that difficult to step up to the plate, make an effort and show another person that you care. Neither does it make you any less of a "man" to show some emotion or show that you really are listening. Of course, if you really aren't, then maybe you should be hit with a chair.

Just let me know where and when. I'm not doing anything on Wednesday.